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Grey Hairs and Acne

I am turning 28 in 14 days and I'm not sure what stage of life I'm in. Sure I'm a mother with three growing children, but I hardly consider my marriage of 8 years (in 23 days) 'young.' Nor do I consider it old. The same goes for myself; many people my age are not even married, some have families larger than mine. Am I old or young? I'm not really a young mother any more am I (I hope not since I'm fairly experienced... well up to 6 years old at least)

And it's a bit scary to realize that the professional athletes are your age (Kobe Bryant [spelling?] just turned 30) weren't they always older than me? And those college kids are now younger than you (let me specify... undergrads).

Then there is the whole body issue. I have gray hairs! Truly I do, I've found several (and immediately pull them out) but I've also got zits, more than I did when I was a teenager. I have a acne at 28! What is wrong with my body, my mind, everything. I'm in some sort of premature midlife trauma. I'm realizing that I can't look for clothes in the juniors section anymore and that if my husband were to kick the bucket I'd have to go after one of the old guys since all the good looking (non gray, full head of hair) guys are younger than me!

I used to want to be 30, now I'm not so excited. I keep dreaming of death. As if he's waiting just around the corner. How absurd of me. I need to focus on something else like the idea that maybe the 30's will turn out to be far more fulfilling and exciting than the 20's. That would be a nice change... as long as these stupid pimples go away first.

Comments

Anonymous said…
My mother-in-law says that her
40's were the best part of her life.
Jennifer said…
Remember how much you used to hate the way people treated you when you were a "young" mother? At least you don't have to put up with people assuming you're too young to know what you're doing, now!

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What do you think?

Mutterings of a Middle-Aged Dreamer

Use your words, my dear sweet soul, they are inside of you... So find them. Write, you silly girl, write so hard the world will never forget you.
But does it matter if the world remembers you? 
Age begins to press its hands upon your chest and the need to be remembered seems to increase with the pressure. 
Stop.
That's not a line of thought you're interested in pursuing. 
Live in the now.
Does it matter if the world remembers you if your neighbor is going hungry? 
Perhaps age is merely pushing you out the door. 
Go. Live in the now.