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Funny Things the Kids Say Part 5673

Ralexwin: If we want to have a nice garden then we're going to need to do something about all those squirrels.

7y/o tyrant: Let's kill them all. We could get some poison and spread it around the yard and make it look like food and then they'd all die.

Me: Did you tell her to say that!?

Ralexwin: No!!!
- - - - - -
Ralexwin: Sometimes you just need to ignore kids when they are bothering you.

6 y/o Dennis the Menace: I'm sorry Dad! But the bad-man inside my head was just to loud.

Ralexwin (chuckling): Well maybe we should practice listening to the good-man.

- - - - -

During a family lesson about loving God. Ralexwin is teaching.

7 y/o girl child bursts into tears.

Ralexwin: What's wrong?

7 y/o: Mommy was trying to pop my toes and I pulled away and my knee hit my eye!

Ralexwin (looking extremely annoyed): Cannwin, will you please pay attention and stop pestering your daughter.

Me: Sorry... she just keeps putting them so close!

- - - - -

6 y/o boy: Alcohol is bad. Sometimes people go to the store and they steal the alcohol and they sneak it out in bags and drink it as they walk down the street.

Me, Ralexwin and our friend Melissa all look at each other.

Me: Really, so who do you know that's done that?

6 y/o: No one. I just figured it out.

- - - - -

7 y/o girl: There's this song I really like that has words you probably won't like.

Ralexwin and me warily: Yeah?

7 y/o singing: Don'tcha wish your girlfriend was hot like me! Don'tcha wish your girlfriend was a freak like me? Don'tcha...

Me: Okay, thank you dear, now off to bed please.

After she leaves, Ralexwin: How many times do you think she's heard that?

Me: Enough to have the beat and words down pat.

Ralexwin: That's just lovely.


Polly Blevins said…
ha ha ha ha ha ha! I'm glad I am not there yet. Cole says funny things but not the ones that make you worry. I will get my turn too.
Jenn said…
Too funny! I remember those days...I about died when Michaela told me she liked that the lady singing was sharing her milkshake with all the boys in the yard. She felt that was very nice of her....I thought i was going to die!!

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