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Kids Say the Darndest Things

Mischievite during a commercial for a theme park: "Mom, I would want to go there, but those dinosaurs might eat me."

Me: "Honey, those dinosaurs are just robots."

Mischievite: "Do the dinosaurs know that?"

---

Conversation with a 3 year old I was babysitting:

Me: "How old are you?"

Her: "Fwee."

Me: "Oh my goodness, you are so old! When is your birthday?"

Her: "Umm."

Me: "Do you know? It's okay if you don't."

Her: "It had yellow frosting!"

---

Vicbowin during a tantrum: "I'm a religious girl and I don't believe in hitting you Mom!"

---

Me to Ralexwin in our nightly phone conversation:

Me: "I know you're tired, so why don't we hang up and then you can relax and go use that Bullet I got you."

Him: "Okay. I love you."

Me: "Except, when I say Bullet I mean blender... you realize that, right?"

Him: **chuckles**

----

Grandmother to Vicbowin: "You know, the vacuum works a lot better if you turn it on."

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Albowin reading the title of his new library book: "Superman! Son of Karopola!"

Me: "Uh, no."

Albowin: "Yes."

Me: "No, dear, that says Krypton."

Albowin: "Oh.... hmm."

---

Me trying to comb through the rats nest of Vicbowin's hair: "Did you even wash your hair?"

Vicbowin: "No, you didn't tell me to."

Me: "Then what on Earth were you doing in there for 15 minutes?"

Vicbowin: "Just laying there, mostly."

Me: ::heavy silence:: "Wait... did you wash your body?"

Vicbowin: "Well, no, you didn't tell me too."

Me: "That's sort of assumed when someone 'takes a shower!' Go take another one."

Vicbowin: "WHAT!"

Me: "I'm serious, the entire point of you showering was to get clean... not to lay there!"

---

Mischievite on his Grandmother's birthday to a stranger in the parking lot after we had bought the cake:

Stranger: "Oh! Is it someone's birthday?!"

Mischievite: "Yep."

Stranger: "Whose?"

Mischievite: "Mine." ::smirk-smirk-smirk::

Stranger: "Oh, how old are you?"

Mischievite: "Four."

Stranger: "What a big boy you are! Happy Birthday."

Mischievite: "Thanks." ::smirk-smirk-smirk::

Comments

Ivy said…
It's so great that you take the time to remember and write these things down.

I love that your daughter is a religious girl...and it stops her from hitting you. It always eases my frustration level when they are yelling and say something like that. So funny.
Polly Blevins said…
I love those. Is that bullet blender the "magic bullet"? I love mine. I think everyone needs to own one.

One day Will was lecturing Dempsey about something. (I was sitting there listening) He was mid sentence when Dempsey bursts in (very indignantly), "Jesus loves me!" I about died. I had to leave the room so I didn't laugh right there during a lecture. Will acknowledged it and then continued the lecture but I think it softened the whole thing. Very funny stuff.
Jackie said…
Oh your blog is so darling! I love the new look!

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What do you think?

Mutterings of a Middle-Aged Dreamer

Use your words, my dear sweet soul, they are inside of you... So find them. Write, you silly girl, write so hard the world will never forget you.
But does it matter if the world remembers you? 
Age begins to press its hands upon your chest and the need to be remembered seems to increase with the pressure. 
Stop.
That's not a line of thought you're interested in pursuing. 
Live in the now.
Does it matter if the world remembers you if your neighbor is going hungry? 
Perhaps age is merely pushing you out the door. 
Go. Live in the now.