Skip to main content

Proof of Identification

This is from my ’thoughts’ file... (the one I write in when I have something hit me that I just have to get out before my brain explodes) enjoy.

My lack of identity came to an apex recently at Wal-Mart. Now I realize that as a mother, my sense of self has long been buried. But the struggle remains! I fight against it, sometimes through bouts of depression, my husband and children never quite realizing what is wrong with mommy. Hah! Mommy is just fine, it’s C that is screaming, C that is crying, C that is refusing to do laundry or cook dinner. My split personality is at war and on Sept. 13, 2007 a battle was won for Mommy.

There I was, feeling a sense of freedom that only a mother of mulitple children can feel. I was down by one. My eldest started kindergarten and feeling an urge to spread my wings I hauled the boys off to Wal-Mart. Now this is no small feat for us, Wal-Mart is in another town, half an hour away. A trip there is a marvel in logistical and tactical planning. One must not go to early, because the baby needs a nap, and if you time it just right the baby will fall asleep in the car and sleep through the whole event.Thereby lowering the enemy combatants down to one. But if you leave to late, you risk running into lunch time hunger as you pass the cookie aisle, (whether the child or mother is more at risk, remains unclear). Take to long and you’re really in for it, the baby will wake, hungry, the munchkin will rise up in revolt and you will spend the rest of your trip trying not to be caught on video tape and taken completely out of context. ("Officer, now isn’t really the time to tell me to be nice to my kids")

Then there is the tactical side, and this is where my four year old comes in. Many would be surprised to learn that I have stooped to levels of bribery, manipulation and if he had any opinion, cruel and unusual punishment to get him to cooperate. He is a study in the field of personal agenda’s, a master at persistence, and often times is mistaken for a rock in the road to perfection (that would be my road, not his). But I must admit, on that day he was unusually compliant (true I had promised him a soda for good behavior...).

So there I was, sleeping baby, happy four year old, not a care in the world beyond which brand of product I wanted, when it came out:

"Oh, Mommy doesn’t like those ones."

It’s done, it’s over. I’ve said the words. I’ve referred to myself in ’third person mommy’. With one last cry from the me inside, my assimilation is complete. And I didn’t even see it coming.


Popular posts from this blog

Altered Shoe Art: Ring Holder Shoe Tutorial

This was my week two craft for So You Think You're Crafty. I placed third that week for this one. I thought you might enjoy finding out how I made it.

I tried about a million different decorations before settling on one that didn't drown out my rings. I wanted them to the focal point. This is also why I went with black fabric and not something more vivid.

Don't be intimidated by the lack of 101 I'm giving you. It really is a straight forward sort of project. If you know how to use a glue gun without burning yourself you can do this. Just be sure to dust off your imaginative brain space first. :)

The one important thing you might be wondering is how I got the pink fabric to stick to the shoe. I really just Mod Podged it on.

There are several different ways to make ring tubes that you can find online. One I saw used that colored foam paper stuff that you find in the kids craft section. I thought that might have been easier, but I had scraps of batting lying around so I …

How-To Pretend You Work For Anthropologie

The problem with Anthropologie is that they cost way too much money. WAY TOO MUCH! I mean, come on--these book boxes:

Cost $68-$188!

Do you have that kind of money?

I don't, but you know what I do have? I have a library with a cart full of free books that no one really cares about! So guess what I did... I made my own (and then I gave them away because I really don't have anywhere to put them).

Here's how.

What do you think?

Car-Seat Cover Tutorial

Choose your fabric. It's fine to buy something a little cheaper for the back, since no one is going to see it. In fact I got both of these fabric pieces in the clearance section at Wal-Mart. You will also need, matching thread, batting for the middle, and binding for the edges. And alot of pins.

Take your old car seat cover and lay it flat on the paper you've chosen to use. You will have several sections you need to trace: A top, a bottom, and any sides or overhanging areas.

Now draw around the first section of the layed out car seat.. Generally speaking you can assume that the binding is hiding your seam so you don't need to make an allowance for it, but be aware that the issue might arise.

Be sure to mark any parts that lie on the inside of the pattern, like strap holes and any extra stitching.

Your patterns will start looking something like this.

When you cut out your pattern sections, remember to write what each line is for, and cut any holes so you can m…