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You Don't Love Me!

Have you ever heard these words from your child?

"You don't love me!"
"You hate me!"
"You want me to cry because you don't care!"

Sound familiar?

Have you ever just wanted to scream, "That's right, I hate you, that's why I've got these damn stretch marks all over my belly. I hated you so much I just had to carry you around in my belly for 9 months, gaining pound after pound after pound."

I have a friend whose first pregnancy was twins, in her last month or so she had to go down and get steroid shots in her rear end, because the babies lungs weren't developed enough.

With my last child I went for nearly six weeks with him 'dropped.' He was literally laying on my pelvic bone (from the inside) for a month and a half.

I have another friend who was bed ridden nearly the entirety of her pregnancy because her body wanted to kick the baby out.

Do kids have any concept of what it is that we do for them, why we love them? No, they don't. It's this vicious cycle of sacrifice.

You sacrifice they take.

So some days I want to say;
"Oh, and these thighs, they used to be SMALL, I used to be able to fit into a size 8. I used to wear a push up bra to accentuate. I used to be able to turn heads with this rear.

Your right to question my love over that toy. I've only cooked every meal for the last 6 years because I wanted you to be certain that your worth was based on a $15 barbie.

I've only scrubbed vomit, poop, pee, and blood off my floors because I wanted you to know just how much I didn't love you.

And don't even get me started on how much I don't love you after that delivery. I've had stitches in places that would make your cringe, lets not talk about what it's like to push a 7lb life through a... well you'll know soon enough. The day will come when you know just exactly how much I DO love you.

You'll know, believe me, when you stare at that figure in the mirror one day, when you see those bright red marks running higgledy-piggledy across your belly. When your stomach hangs to your knees and you finally understand why women wore corsets, or when you walk past those strapless dresses and miniskirts without batting an eye you'll understand.

So go ahead kid, scream about how much I don't love you, but do it in your room I've got a house to clean, a dinner to cook, a diaper to change and a list of school supplies to buy. Go scream in there for awhile. I'm busy showing you I do love you."

Comments

Lisa said…
Amen. Amen.

Love the comment about how a bra used to accentuate. Now it's just needed to look normal again. Ah... I never had much to begin with, but at least I had something.
TerĂ©sa said…
Aww.. too cute. I loved it.
The Paynes said…
Ahh! That's so me with the twins and steroids. Talk about a sting! Don't forget walking and rocking to sleep for hours. Love your post!

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