Skip to main content

Boy Oh Boy

Do you know the story of Esther in the Bible? About the edict to annihilate the Jews and how Esther stops it?

Well, Esther has this uncle, Mordecai, and when he discovers that his people have been slotted for destruction he goes before the gates of the palace and tears his clothes, puts ash all over his body and wails.

Sometimes I feel like doing that.

Sometimes I feel like pulling a Brittany Spears and shaving off all my hair.

Sometimes I feel like forgoing all pretenses and just ripping my hair out--this morning would be one of those times.

This morning when I woke to my Mischievite handing me a band-aid for his ouch. The band aid from the medicine box that sits on the microwave that is hanging from the top of the counter in the middle of the kitchen.

This morning when I rolled over to open the band aid (not thinking about why he might need one) and took a big sniff of the air around me. It didn't take long to notice the difference, the burning wax smell that was wafting into my room.

So how do you suppose I reacted? Taking into account that my 2 year old is who he is and does all the crazy things you've read about?

It's quite simple really.

"Did you put something on the fireplace!?" I sat bolt upright in bed. "Iyawin! You answer me NOW!"

"Yes, mama."

"Is that why you need a band aid!? Because you burnt your finger?!"

"Yes, mama."

"AAAAAH!"

So there I am in my night time attire bolting across the house to where the fireplace is.

(This is where the ashes and cloth rending comes in.)

I make it into the family room, see a bunch of paper leaning nicely against the stove and melted plastic covering its top AND the Mischievite's older brother sitting comfortably two feet away playing on the computer.

I lost it. I yelled and the full Mom mode came out.*

"TURN THAT OFF!"

I layed into him. Layed in hard.

"When you and Iyawin are awake he is YOUR responsibility. And I KNOW you are smart enough to understand that putting things on the fireplace is bad, but you were to busy playing on that computer to stop him or come tell me! THE HOUSE COULD HAVE GONE UP IN FLAMES BEHIND YOU AND YOU WOULDN'T HAVE FLINCHED!!!!!"

I was pretty dang mad. I was livid.

What can you expect? I was inhaling toxic fumes.

Albowin looked penitent. Iyawin was in tears. I took a deep breath and told Albowin to go get dressed. He shuffled down the hall, past his sisters' room (where both girls were still asleep) to his own and then, as if he was testing my resolve, he hollered:

"Mom! I need my light on!"

Yep, you thought I was mad before... I actually swore at this point. (Remember I'm still in my PJ's). Which I'm sure was the real reason the girls woke up, but we won't mention that to anyone, okay.

Ten minutes later Ralexwin comes home from his run and finds me in my bath robe sitting in the front room with a scowl on my face.

"What is that smell?" He asks. Then he pauses to think, "Iyawin?"

I nod. "He put a plastic bag on the stove and Albowin practically helped."

Ralexwin groans.

I nod again.

"If it's not one thing, it's another with that one."

"You're telling me."

So fine blogging friends, when next week you see on the national news that a family burnt to death in their own home after succumbing to toxic fumes, you'll know I won't be posting anytime soon.



--------
*It's worth noting that Albowin had been attempting to play on the computer since 4 AM (I had unplugged it...that's another blog) and his dad must have replugged it in for him.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Altered Shoe Art: Ring Holder Shoe Tutorial

This was my week two craft for So You Think You're Crafty. I placed third that week for this one. I thought you might enjoy finding out how I made it.


I tried about a million different decorations before settling on one that didn't drown out my rings. I wanted them to the focal point. This is also why I went with black fabric and not something more vivid.

Don't be intimidated by the lack of 101 I'm giving you. It really is a straight forward sort of project. If you know how to use a glue gun without burning yourself you can do this. Just be sure to dust off your imaginative brain space first. :)

The one important thing you might be wondering is how I got the pink fabric to stick to the shoe. I really just Mod Podged it on.

There are several different ways to make ring tubes that you can find online. One I saw used that colored foam paper stuff that you find in the kids craft section. I thought that might have been easier, but I had scraps of batting lying around so I …

How-To Pretend You Work For Anthropologie

The problem with Anthropologie is that they cost way too much money. WAY TOO MUCH! I mean, come on--these book boxes:

Cost $68-$188!

Do you have that kind of money?

I don't, but you know what I do have? I have a library with a cart full of free books that no one really cares about! So guess what I did... I made my own (and then I gave them away because I really don't have anywhere to put them).

Here's how.
















What do you think?

Car-Seat Cover Tutorial

Choose your fabric. It's fine to buy something a little cheaper for the back, since no one is going to see it. In fact I got both of these fabric pieces in the clearance section at Wal-Mart. You will also need, matching thread, batting for the middle, and binding for the edges. And alot of pins.


Take your old car seat cover and lay it flat on the paper you've chosen to use. You will have several sections you need to trace: A top, a bottom, and any sides or overhanging areas.


Now draw around the first section of the layed out car seat.. Generally speaking you can assume that the binding is hiding your seam so you don't need to make an allowance for it, but be aware that the issue might arise.


Be sure to mark any parts that lie on the inside of the pattern, like strap holes and any extra stitching.


Your patterns will start looking something like this.


When you cut out your pattern sections, remember to write what each line is for, and cut any holes so you can m…