Skip to main content

The Agony of Defeat


View from the ground.
Have you ever fallen down as an adult?

I have... frequently.

In  fact I did just yesterday, and as always it was quite embarrassing.

You see, the kids didn't have school yesterday (parent teacher conferences) so we took the chance to head over to the park for a little fresh air and playtime. Remewin was out there running around with the best of them while I chatted with some of the other park-moms.

Things were going well. The air was crisp with only a small bite to it. The leaves were falling gently to the ground. Remewin was climbing to the top of the slide. The grass was green.

Wait...

I sat up. My 15 month old was nearly to the top.

I hurried over to the play set while the other mothers moved on.

"Baby." I said in that sweet, gentle mother's voice, "You can't be climbing up here by yourself. Did you want to go down the slide?"

Being the wonderful mom that I am, I gently placed her on my lap and sat at the tip-top of that long straight fall to the ground.

"I hate slides." I muttered to myself as my other three kids crowded around me.

"You're going to go down the slide?!" They asked, excited (I don't usually participate in the play).

"Yep." I breathed. "Have I ever told you why I don't like slides?"

"Yes, Mom." They chimed in that tone that suggest I've told them one to many times.

So I did what anyone would do at the top of a slide. I let go.

To say that I slid would be an understatement. I rocketed. I broke the sound barrier. I may have passed the speed of light.

Remewin did not like it and by the time we hit the bottom of the slide (0.3 seconds later) she was protesting vocally.

Except what neither of us knew in that moment was that the ride wasn't over.

No.

Have Remewin in my arms cause me to careen forward. My feet landed soundly on the ground but my upper body kept going. I took a quick few shuffling steps to try to compensate.

It didn't work, so I took a few more.

Pretty soon I was running pell-mell across the grass like a charging bull. My legs weren't offsetting the extra thirty pounds in my arms but they were sure trying.

My mind was racing. Okay, at some point I'm going to have to land. How do I do this without hurting Remewin. What are my options. Why can't my stupid legs move faster.

Eventually I hit ground.

Hard.

I'm not sure how I managed it but I set Remewin down gently next to me as I skidded to a grand and painful halt and rolled onto my back.

Ouch.

In seconds the kids were above me laughing.

"Mom, that was so funny!"

"Wow. Why did you keep going?"

"Mom, you so silly."

I grabbed my startled Remewin into my arms and cuddled her and laughed. "Did we fall down!?" I giggled. Remewin wasn't sure what to make of it all, so she just went along with everyone's smiles.

Still laying on the ground (splayed out like a dead man) I wondered if the other mom's had seen my not so graceful demise. They probably did... it always works that way.

I sat up. I had grass stains on my favorite pair of jeans that ran from my shins all the way to my knee's. My ankle was aching, my knee was aching (yes... the gimp knee even). I looked around and laughed a bit hysterically.

I was about 2 yards away from the slide.

The stupid thing had rocketed me.

The kids were still laughing and replaying the whole event. I smiled at them and laughed, all the while knowing I was going to pay for my mishap in the morning.

And that's the truth--falling down as an adult never goes well. I don't know if it's because we're just so much heavier, or if it's because we're further off the ground. Maybe it's because we're out of shape or our bones aren't as supple... whatever it is the truth is that when I woke up this morning my left side ached from neck to ankle.

Forgotten as the event is in the minds of my kids, I'm still here paying the price.

And I'm still wondering if those other mom's saw me--because, somehow, that would make it all so much worse.

Comments

Ivy said…
It's so funny that the first thing the kids did was laugh. You've certainly taught them to have a sense of humor. Good job. Always better to laugh than to cry,right.?
Saimi said…
You may have felt clumsy but you handled it with grace! Well done!
Polly Blevins said…
That is the one thing, as an adult, even if you do see it, you pretend you didn't. Hopefully that will help take out the sting from the fallee. I always look the other way and pretend that I didn't even notice. Which can be hard because sometime, like your kids, I really want to laugh.
Lisa said…
You are an AWESOME mom! I can't believe you went up to the top of the slide! I would have pulled the baby down or grabbed an older sibling to take her down! But thanks for the giggle. Good to know that we aren't alone in our clumsiness moments!
woot woot to you!!! that was the best fall ever!! you rocket mom! (the best part? you splayed down like a dead man...lol!) don't you worry if the other moms saw you! you ROCK!!!!!!!
Lazarus said…
Very funny and very well written. I particularly liked the line about the day having "a bite" to it. Great descriptions, keep up the terrific writing!
Charlotte said…
I slipped and fell on a crayon last Sunday. I'm still sore down my entire right side. I guess that means I should avoid the slides from now on. Thanks for the heads up!

(and congrats on the baby safe landing!)
Cannwin said…
A crayon! Were there any witnesses? That's one I would surely end up doing in front of my husbands entire family and then not be able to live down for the next 20 years.
Myya said…
I hope you aren't hurting too much from your rocket trip. The best thing though is that all your kids really will remember is how much fun they had & how hard they laughed when you were playing with them at the park :)

Popular posts from this blog

Altered Shoe Art: Ring Holder Shoe Tutorial

This was my week two craft for So You Think You're Crafty. I placed third that week for this one. I thought you might enjoy finding out how I made it.


I tried about a million different decorations before settling on one that didn't drown out my rings. I wanted them to the focal point. This is also why I went with black fabric and not something more vivid.

Don't be intimidated by the lack of 101 I'm giving you. It really is a straight forward sort of project. If you know how to use a glue gun without burning yourself you can do this. Just be sure to dust off your imaginative brain space first. :)

The one important thing you might be wondering is how I got the pink fabric to stick to the shoe. I really just Mod Podged it on.

There are several different ways to make ring tubes that you can find online. One I saw used that colored foam paper stuff that you find in the kids craft section. I thought that might have been easier, but I had scraps of batting lying around so I …

How-To Pretend You Work For Anthropologie

The problem with Anthropologie is that they cost way too much money. WAY TOO MUCH! I mean, come on--these book boxes:

Cost $68-$188!

Do you have that kind of money?

I don't, but you know what I do have? I have a library with a cart full of free books that no one really cares about! So guess what I did... I made my own (and then I gave them away because I really don't have anywhere to put them).

Here's how.
















What do you think?

I Am A Phoenix

This is a drawing I did right after my divorce, when I was trying to discover my life's course and who I was as a person. Divorce is this horrendously nasty thing that leaves a person with little to nothing of who they were before (at least that's how it was for me). My family was gone, at one point I had counted up blood/legal relatives that had stopped talking to me and it was nearly 60. Things were bad, but one of the recurring comments I heard from other divorcee's was 'Get bitter, or get better.' So I aimed for better. I came up with my own personal code of conduct (Quiet Dignity) and my own personal motto.

The motto the drawing is based off of is: 
"I am a Phoenix. I was born for the fire and I will rise from the ashes."
But, that's not all. Each aspect of the drawing has meaning. I researched these... so I hope I got them right. lol
I chose to make my image reminiscent of a mandala with the most significant parts at the very center. The shape i…