Skiving Off
On Friday night I recieved a whopping 5 hours of sleep. This was completely and unequivocally the result of a certain mischevious three year old who crawled into bed with us and tossed and turned all night. I finally retreated to the couch, only to be woken by the baby at 4:30AM--at which point my night was over.
I was tired on Saturday, as you can imagine, but Saturday was Ralexwin's birthday so I had a lot to accomplish... including baking a cake, wrapping presents, wrangling kids, cooking a special dinner and--believe it or not--going to book club.
I fell into bed on Saturday night at around 11:00PM and swore I wasn't going to ever wake up again.
Remewin had other plans.
She woke at 1:00 AM and insisted on staying up until 2:00AM. When I finally got her back down I returned to the my sanctuary to discover it had again been overtaken by that same three year old. I tried to convince Ralexwin to move him but he just mumbled something incoherent about shoving the kid in his direction and rolled back to sleep. I grumbled and headed to the couch.
5:30AM found me awake with Remewin again. Four hours of sleep Saturday night, totalling a whopping nine hours in two nights.
I was grumpy, ornery, and snappy. I decided to try to take a hot shower to wipe away the exhaustion... the hot water was all gone.
I got out of the shower and found Remewin sitting on the floor in front of the bathroom crying. I picked her up... she stopped crying. I walked into the bedroom and set her on the bed... she started crying, I picked her up... she stopped crying. I sighed. It was going to be one of those mornings.
Baby in one arm I began to rummage through my church clothes. Nothing was fitting and I ended up in a yucky mis-matching number that screamed 'tired mommy!' I put it on.
I told the kids to get ready for church.
I yelled at the kids to get ready for church.
I threatened bodily injury if they didn't get ready for church.
I put Remewin down in order to scare them into getting ready for church. She started crying so I picked her up... she stopped crying.
It was an hour before we were supposed to be there and I was standing in the midst of screaming naked children in my frumpy clothes when I realized I was supposed to be teaching at church. I nearly cried, but instead bravely went in search for my lesson manual.
I couldn't find it, so I tore the house apart with no luck... it must have walked away.
Remewin was on the floor crying. Albowin was laying in his bed complaining of a stomach ache. Vicbowin was chattering at me about her book... oblivious to the decibel level around us. Iyawin was running around in his third pair of underwear.
I did what any mother who values her sanity would do. I retreated into my bedroom (Remewin in tow).
Everyone followed me.
That was the straw that broke the mommies back. That was it, I didn't care if I had to teach, I didn't care if my kids went to church in ripped up jeans, I was D-O-N-E. I wasn't leaving my room for all the tea in China.
Ralexwin came home and I informed him I wasn't going to church. He shrugged disappointedly and got the kids ready in fifteen minutes (grrr).
I wrote a note to the appropriate people:
M-
I'm not going to be able to make it today. Sorry to drop the ball like this, but Remewin hasn't stopped crying since she woke up and I don't really want to deal with her in public.
C.
Then I handed it to Vicbowin to pass along.
I kissed my family good-bye. Told my children to behave themselves (all from my bed, because I wasn't leaving--remember) then rolled over and fell blissfully, un-remorsefully asleep. I slept for three hours.
When they came home I was the loving, smiling mommy that they were used to. It's amazing what sleep can do for a person.
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The note never made it to church. Instead a determined Vicbowin--realizing she'd lost the message--tried to recite it:
"Mom says she's not coming to church and you need to teach her lesson."
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